Helen Keller said, …life is a daring adventure or nothing. Some of your life “adventures” you will choose but others will choose you. When things fall apart, here’s an inspiring thought: while time, money, resources, support, and brilliance may have limits, the potential you possess has none. Remember this so you can be your own best encourager during times of change, challenge, or catharsis.
In my book Stick To It! I created “The Law of Opposites.” Three of them come to mind when considering the crises we occasionally have to face.
1. When we most need to take good care of ourselves we are least likely to do so.
2. When we most need to keep our mouths shut we are most likely to sound off.
3. When we most need love we are our most unlovable.
Can you relate? In tough times, human nature being what it is, most of us get defensive and slip into self-protection mode (I do). Temporarily, this makes sense but for the long term this can be our undoing. At some point we must come to terms, examine the situation from all sides, open our hearts, let go of our defenses, and move toward resolution.
This is difficult, tedious, and painful. The only short cut through grief or emotional pain is to plunge into its depths and slowly work our way through it. Otherwise we get stuck. In a workshop years ago, Sid Simon stated that “In some way we help to create, contribute to, and cooperate in every sticky situation we find ourselves in.” This certainly applies to relationships.
Discovering and dissecting our part in a predicament is the first step toward liberation. Acknowledging the imperfect nature of human nature allows our compassion to kick in (first for ourselves and then for our transgressors) so we can escape the past and return to the present. We forgive what we can and begin to release our self-inflicted pain. Journaling, talking with a best friend or counselor, and list-making help us learn, let go, begin our healing, and move on.
Simple Action: In times of crisis, self-protections may work for the short term but in the long term they confine you to the past. Love yourself, reopen your heart, and enrich your true nature by choosing to once again live fully in the present with an eye on your future.